Covenant of Marriage
COVENANT OF MARRIAGE Dr. Diana White Johnson
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What does covenant have to do with marriage? Covenant is God’s idea and ideal for marriage.
God is a covenant God, the bible is a covenant book, and we are a covenant people. God has clearly chosen to operate in the lives of His people on the basis of covenant. In the Old Testament, or Old Covenant, the sacrifice of animals and the sprinkling of blood served as an atonement (covering) for sin. In the New Testament, or New Covenant, the death of Christ on the cross was the ultimate sacrifice for sin. The Lamb of God fulfilled the covenant for all mankind (Is. 53v6) paying sin’s debt in full.
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A Marriage Covenant Is Serious The Hebrew word for covenant is berith, which connotes a cutting of the flesh causing blood to flow out. The Hebrew act of “cutting covenant” was so serious that it was inaugurated with blood.
The shedding of the blood of sacrificed animals in the Old Testament and the blood of Jesus on the Cross were acts of covenant. In the Old Testament, covenants were so serious that God held accountable those who broke covenant, not only by divorce but also within the relationship.
In Malachi, God identified marriage as a covenant that cannot be broken without serious consequences. He speaks directly to the husband concerning loving and showing love to his wife (Mal. 2v13-16).
God told the Israelites that marriage is a sacred covenant. The vows spoken at the marriage altar are not to be taken lightly; God expects married people to keep them. God’s own faithfulness to His covenant promises to Abraham and the Israelites demonstrates the importance of fulfilling our promises to each other.
God values marriage, our vows that He has heard are to be kept. God delights in those who remain faithful to each other, which love each other, and strive to raise children devoted to Him.
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Covenant vs. Contract
In marriage, people’s commitment to each other comes out of God’s commitment to us. God has promised to love, protect, cherish, and cars for us forever – and that is a covenant that cannot be broken. Likewise, He has empowered husbands and wives to love, protect, cherish, and care for each other until death, and that is a covenant that should not be broken.
Covenant is the “invisible” foundation that makes long-term marriage possible. It is the secret to unlocking the mystery of “oneness” and the delight of fulfillment.Covenant demands the death on two wills and the birth of one. “I” becomes “we” never to be separated again. The Bible says, “ They are no longer two but one flesh” (Matt.19v6). That is basic covenant!
The Hebrew word for being “united” or “joined” together means to cleave, cling, or stick. The corresponding Greek word means to be “glued” together. Covenant marriage partners, permanently bonded, will not come” unglued” when pressures come against the marriage.
Although we live in a contractual society, God knew that people could not build marriage on private contract that can be easily canceled and cast aside on the basis of personal whims and weaknesses. He knew that a contract would not sustain the pain, pitfall, and pressures of marriage between two imperfect human beings.
Long- term marriage demands more than a piece of paper to go the distance. It requires the supernatural merging of lives and the binding of hearts. To marry by contract is to say, “Now that I’ve signed what do I get?”
The focus is on “receiving”. To marry by covenant is to say, “I am giving myself to you unconditionally.” The focus is on giving. In a contract, two become connected until the agreement is broken. In covenant two become committed until death parts them.Courts enforce contracts. Covenants are enforced by character. A contract calls for the signing of names; a covenant calls for the binding of hearts.
There is no such thing as a covenant without sacrifice, and marriage is designed to be the most sacrificial of all relationships. Selfishness is the root cause of all marital conflicts. Therefore, the key to a successful and lasting marriage is for the individuals will to die. It takes a lot of dying for a marriage to live. “Me-ness” must become “we-ness”. The more unselfish we are, the happier we will be in our marriages. “The essence of covenant marriage is that two people become one”
Commentary by Fred LoweryFrom the HOPE Bible
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Pastor Joe Johnson & Dr. Diana White Johnson minister at:
Risen Son of Faith Christian Center – http://www.rsofcc.com
gg said,
January 27, 2009 at 8:40 pm
My husband left 8 years ago we are not divorced. When he first left I was angry, mad and sad, I asked God to change my husband after several months I asked God to change me. When I spoke to a pastor, and a minister they immediatly told me the scriptures would allow me to divorce him. I wasn’t seeking or expecting this recommendation and was baffled by their eagerness to take a step in this directon. I have trusted God’s word to me, that if I am faithful my whole household will be saved. I continue standing for my marriage but not only because to the scriptures. I stand because I love my husband and I know that I know that what God joins together no man can separate,destroy or kill. Everyday life has not been easy but I trust God every single day and that one day soon He will restore our marriage.