LOVE DARE
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Day 37 – LOVE AGREES IN PRAYER
If two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask,
it shall be done for them by My Father. – Matthew 18:19
If someone told you that by changing one thing about your marriage, you could guarantee with near 100 percent assurance that your life together would significantly improve, you would at least want to know what it was. And for many godly couples, that “one thing” is the daily practice of praying together.
To someone who tends to devalue spiritually matters, this sounds fairly ridiculous. And if told that shared prayer is a key ingredient in marital longevity and leads to a heightened sense of sexual intimacy, they would think you had really gone too far. But the unity that grows between a man and woman who regularly pray together forms an intense and powerful connection. Within the sanctuary of your marriage, praying together can work wonders on every level of your relationship.
When you were joined together as husband and wife, God gave you a wedding gift – a permanent prayer partner for life. When you need wisdom on a certain decision, you and your prayer partner can seek God together for the answer. When you’re struggling with your own fears and insecurities, your prayer partner can hold your hand and intercede on your behalf. When you and your spouse are not getting along and can’t get past a particular argument or sticking point, you can call a time out, drop your weapons, and go with your partner into emergency prayer. It should become your automatic reflex action when you don’t know what else to do.
It’s hard to stay angry long with someone for whom you’re praying. It’s hard not to back down when you’re hearing your mate humbly cry out to God and beg Him for mercy in the midst of your heated crisis. In prayer, two people remember that God has made them one. And in the grip of His uniting presence, disharmony blends into beauty.
Praying for your spouse leads your heart to care more deeply about them. But more importantly, God is pleased when He sees you both humbling yourselves and seeking His face together. His blessing falls on you when you agree in prayer.
The word Jesus used when He talked about “agreeing” in prayer has the idea of a harmonic symphony. Two separate notes, played one at a time, sound different. They’re opposed to each other. But play them at the same time – in agreement – and they can create a pleasing sense of harmony. Together they give a fuller, more complete sound than either of them can make on its own.
Agreeing in prayer is like that – even in the midst of disagreeing. It pulls you both back toward your real center. It places you on common ground, face-to-face before the Father. It restores harmony in the midst of contention
The church – which in Scripture has a marriage connotation with Christ – can sometimes be a place where conflict rules. The disharmony that can glare up over various matters can derail the church from its mission and disrupt the free flow of worship and unity. At times godly church leaders will see what is taking place, break off discussions, and call the people of God to prayer. Instead of continuing the discord and allowing more feeling to be hurt, they will seek unity by turning their hearts back to God and appealing to Him for help.
The same thing happens in our homes when there is an intervention of prayer, even at high points of disagreement. It stops the bleeding. It quiets the loud voices. It pauses you as you realize whose presence you’re in.
But prayer is for a lot more than breaking up fights. Prayer is a privilege to be enjoyed on a consistent, daily basis. When you know that prayer time awaits you before going to bed, it will change the way you spend your evening. Even if your prayers together are typically short and to the point, this will become a standing appointment that you can orbit your day around, keeping God in the middle of everything.
It’s true that beginning a habit like this can initially feel awkward and uncomfortable. Anything this powerful will surprise you with its weight and responsibility when you actually try doing it. But bear in mind that God wants you to engage with Him – invites you, in fact – and He will grow you as you take it seriously and push past those times when you don’t know what to say.
You’ll look back at this common thread that ran through everything from average Mondays to major decisions and be so thankful for this “one thing” that changed everything. This is one area where it’s imperative that you agree to agree.
TODAY’S DARE – DAY 37
ASK YOUR SPOUSE IF YOU CAN BEGIN PRAYING TOGETHER. TALK ABOUT THE BEST TIME TO DO THIS, WHETHER IT’S IN THE MORNING, YOUR LUNCH HOUR, OR BEFORE BEDTIME. USE THIS TIME TO COMMIT YOUR CONCERNS, DISAGREEMENTS, AND NEEDS BEFORE THE LORD. DON’T FORGET TO THANK HIM FOR HIS PROVISION AND BLESSING. EVEN IF YOUR SPOUSE REFUSES TO DO THIS, RESOLVE TO SPEND THIS DAILY TIME IN PRAYER YOURSELF.
__ Check here when you’ve completed today’s dare.
What can you do to help your mate be willing for the two of you to begin praying together? If you agreed to pray together, what was it like? What did you learn from it?
For insight into the keys of effective prayer, see the Appendix below.
In the morning my prayer comes before You. (Psalm 88:13)
Appendix I
The Locks and Keys of Effective Prayer
The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much. – James 5:16 NIV
THE LOCKS: TEN THINGS THAT BLOCK PRAYER
1. Praying without Knowing God through Jesus – John 14:6 – Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.”
2. Praying from an Unrepentant Heart – Psalm 66:18 – 19 NIV – “If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened; but God has surely listened and heard my voice in prayer.”
3. Praying for Show – Matthew 6:5 – “When you pray, you are not to be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and on the street corners so that they may be seen by men. Truly I say to you, they have their reward in full.”
4. Praying Repetitive, Empty Words – Matthew 6:7-8 – “And when you are praying, do not use meaningless repetition as the Gentiles do, for they suppose that they will be heard for their many words. So do not be like them; for your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.”
5. Prayers Not Prayed - James 4:2 – “You do not have because you do not ask.”
6. Praying with a Lustful Heart – James 4:3 – “You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures.”
7. Praying while Mistreating Your Spouse – 1 Peter 3:7 – “You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way…and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.”
8. Praying while Ignoring the Poor – Proverbs 21:13 – “He who shuts his ear to the cry of the poor will also cry himself and not be answered.
9. Praying with Bitterness in Your Heart toward Someone – Mark 11:25-26 – “Whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father who is in heaven will also forgive you your transgressions. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father who is in heaven forgive your transgressions.”
10. Praying with a Faithless Heart – James 1:6-8 – “But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one you doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.”
THE KEYS: TEN THINGS THAT MAKE PRAYER EFFECTIVE
1. Praying by Asking, Seeking, and Knocking
Matthew 7:7-8, 11 – “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened…If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him!”
2. Praying in Faith
Mark 11:24 – “Therefore I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they will be granted you.”
3. Praying in Secret
Matthew 6:6 – “But you, when you pray, go into your inner room, close your door and pray to your Father who is in secret, and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you.”
4. Praying according to God’s Will
1 John 5:14 – “This is the confidence we have before Him, that, if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.”
5. Praying in Jesus’ Name
John 14:13-14 – “Whatever you ask in My name, that will I do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask Me anything in My name, I will do it.”
6. Praying in Agreement with Other Believers
Matthew 18:19-20 – “Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven. For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.”
7. Praying while Fasting
Acts 14:23 – “When they had appointed elders for them in every church, having prayed with fasting, they commended them to the Lord in whom they had believed.”
8. Praying from an Obedient Life
1 John 3:21-22 – “Beloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have confidence before God; and whatever we ask we receive from Him, because we keep His commandments and do the things that are pleasing in His sight.”
9. Praying while Abiding in Christ and His Word
John 15:7 – “If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.”
10. Praying while Delighting in the Lord
Psalm 37:4 “Delight yourself in the Lord; and He will give you the desires of your heart.”
A SUMMARY OF THE LOCKS AND KEYS OF PRAYER
1. You must be in a right relationship with God.
2. You must be in a right relationship with other people.
3. Your heart must be right.
Pastors Joe and Diana Johnson, Senior Pastors
Risen Son of Faith Christian Center
11200 Baseline Road
Rancho Cucamonga, Ca. 91730
(800) 646-0796
